Yes, I did it. I'm not proud, and the thing is, I know better. There are just certain things you just don't do. Certain codes you don't break. You don't date your friends old boyfriends. As you get older, you don't ditch your friends for a guy. You don't date your boss. You don't flirt with your kid's teachers or coaches. Don't get your meat where you buy your bread.
The Cardinal Rule: You don't mix your salons. You go to a different salon for hair, waxing, nails, massage, facials, little injectibles, etc. You can't mix them. You can't have your facial where you get your hair cut. What happens if you have to break up with one of them? That makes for the awkward hello when you see them again. You know that they talk about you when you leave. Compare your stories. Who needs that kind of stress?
I never want to be known as the salon whore. I don't want to know the name of every hairdresser because I've gone to everyone in the salon. I like long-term relationships. I do. I don't want to date around. I've never had a problem before staying faithful. In Arizona, I had the same stylist for years. The same nail person. The same doctors, dentists, etc. Since I've been Living in Sin (City), I can't stay faithful. I've had 3 gynecologists, and looking for number 4. I've had my hair cut by a million people, some of them licensed, and have only found one that I loved. His cut was $175. I only went a couple of times, Robert. Even I just can't justify it. I've had so many nail people I can't even count. My previous nail lady actually asked to use my address so her kids to go to school in my school district. It is our "extra" house and no one lives there. I told her I didn't think it would be a good idea, and unbeknownst to me, she decided not to take no for an answer. I didn't realize what had happened until an officer from the Clark County School District left a note on the door that they were verifying an address. I called and said little Johnny did not live there. No, not for the past two years that he's been using the address. I assume he found another school and is not learning in a cardboard box under the underpass. So, some I've had to break up with some because they were crappy, and some I've had to break up with because they had a touch of The Crazy.
I have a nail person that I've been going to for about a year. I like her. She's pleasant, she knows what I like, and she doesn't cancel on me. She just found out she was having a baby. I bought her a present. We are all good. Right across from her station is a very nice lady who cuts hair, and is good friends with the nail lady. I've seen her clients come and go for over a year now. The cuts are good. The color is good. So, I tried her out on the kids. It all went fine, so I signed up. I KNEW I WAS BREAKING THE RULE. Truth is, I have a touch of The Lazy so it was a convenience thing for me. So, she cuts my hair. All was good. Robert actually noticed I had it cut and liked it. So, I have her color it. It was ok. I'm actually new to coloring, so it always takes me some time to get used to it all. I went in Friday for a cut. I said to the woman, "I just barely want it trimmed. I want the scissors to wave by the hair and cut off the stragglers. Less than 1/8 of an inch, please." SHE CUT BANGS. It was at least 2 inches across the bottom and 5-6 for the bangs. I screamed at her that I have not had bangs since the infamous Dorothy Hamill haircut when I was 9, and they were as terrible then as they are now. I can't even put it in a ponytail, which is crucial to my training. Oh, and the chunky layers you put in might have looked good on a little chickie who is 19, but looks like a desperate attempt at youth on a 41 year old. Oh, and also, you don't want to thin this hair because now you are able to read a book through it.
Now I'm in a salon dilemma. I don't have to address it right away because my hair is so damn short that I wont need another cut for months but it's looming. Weighing quite heavily on my mind. Feeling pretty good about myself with my oompa loompa face which is still not cleared up, and my lovely new do, especially since I have a job interview today. Doesn't it sound fun to go to an interview with someone you've never met and have to preface the fact that I usually can open my eyes more than 3 mm, or those huge purple bags under my eyes is only because my cheeks are so swollen, and when I smile, I look like a bulldog because of the extra swollen wrinkles?
Internet, I need your advice. Anyone have any good salon break-up strategies?
No comments:
Post a Comment